For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks…

Waldemar & Max

Hello lovies! This week I’m finally venturing into new territory with my Advice Column. While I may not be the wisest person you will ever meet, I’ve definitely gone through and overcome enough unwise things in my life to offer up a few tips . Today’s topic is one that I’ve had to deal with quite a bit throughout the years, and I feel like it’s something most of us have experienced frequently. So grab a cup of coffee, relax, and humor me as I relay my thoughts.

For a good portion of my life I’ve been someone who tends to speak out negative things. I wouldn’t necessarily say I was depressed or a down-and-out kind of person, but it seemed almost easier to talk negatively than positively – easier to bond over the bad things, easier to put myself down before someone else could, easier to make fun of an activity instead of purely having fun. The funny thing is, it took me years to even recognize this pattern.

A couple of years ago I started to develop an anxiety disorder. It was like fear gripped my heart and I couldn’t do the simplest of acts without feeling overwhelmed. It was a horrible time, and I felt like my life was being robbed away. I realized then how often I spoke out negative thoughts, and how that constant thought pattern was affecting me.

Now I’m not one of those people who subscribe to the power of positive thinking. But, I will say this: the way you speak affects the way you think. Our words are much more powerful than we tend to think both on others and ourselves.

So here’s the advice: consider your words. Are you someone who tends to critique, put yourself or others down (even jokingly), says the words “worry,” “afraid,” “I can’t,” “I don’t think I can,” etc. often? Are your Facebook or Twitter statuses generally negative? I think for most of us, it’s such a second nature that we don’t even realize it! Instead of speaking out your fears or worries and negative thoughts – mulling and dwelling over them – replace it with confidence. I’m not talking about being fake, hiding your emotions behind a wall of  forced happiness. You should express how you feel. Rather it’s about changing a routine of negativity. When I started doing this, my thought pattern changed. Declaring hope and a positive future, not allowing my mind to go to those negative places, and speaking out thankfulness rather than feeling lack along with prayer helped me overcome my anxiety issues (no drugs here and 100% better, woohoo!).

Pardon the vulnerability, but I think it’s something that many of us don’t realize in ourselves, and that we can work on. It’s something I continue to battle with! But, I can say I am a lot better for it.

Have a lovely weekend!

PS – I am by no means saying medication for mental issues is wrong. There is definitely a need for it in some cases. I’m just soooo thankful I don’t have to deal with it personally anymore.

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