Got babies on my mind...
Rather than advice, this post is more of a “I’d like to hear your opinion” piece. Not too long ago I read an article in Elle Magazine about women who attempted just about every trick in the book in order to have the “right” gendered baby. It featured a woman who literally went into depression after finding out she was having another boy after intense medical treatments to have a girl. She became a part of a support group filled with mothers who desired a boy/girl, but were unsuccessful (side note: these women all had healthy children already as well, just the wrong gender).
When I read the article, I admit I was a bit conflicted on my feelings. I was appalled by the mother’s reaction of course, how she devalued her sons and made them feel less than adequate. I was angry that these ladies who were able to have healthy, perfectly amazing children could complain when there are so many women who would kill to be able to be in their place. But on the other side of the coin, how many of us have an “ideal” image of what our families will look like? I’ll be the first to say that I’ve been dreaming of having two boys and a girl (names picked out and everything, which is funny because if you know me, I’m not big on kids right now).
So here’s my question to you: where do you draw the line when it comes to selecting the gender of your child? Are you all for taking whatever measures you can? Are you perfectly fine with whatever you end up having? Does it make you uncomfortable, or do you feel like women have a viable reason to pursue these means for an end? Or are you like and are simply conflicted? Let me know!
Angeline
1 month ago
I read that article, too! I think a lot of women glamourize and idealize what motherhood “should” be like. With the onslaught of celebrity moms everywhere in recent years, I think it’s only gotten worse. It makes me sad to think that children are being neglected by their birth mothers for being born the “wrong” gender. I hope these women get the help they need, since I do believe it is a psychological issue.
For me, even though it’s a few years off, I would be ecstatic to get a boy or a girl (something in between, I’m not so thrilled about at this time, but should it happen I know I could deal). My husband and I wax poetic occasionally about “wouldn’t it be great if our future son did this?” or “when we have a daughter I’d love to take her there.” We both come from families with one boy and one girl, so maybe that’s what makes us think both ways automatically. If you asked me which I’d prefer…well, honestly, I don’t prefer one over the other. On top of that, I don’t believe being born a gender really makes a difference. My dad had a son and a daughter, but when it came down to doing handy work in the garage or changing spark plugs on the car, I was his right-hand gal because that’s just what I was into. I don’t think having a child of a different gender necessarily means you won’t get the same experience…the barrier is in your own mind.
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Maria Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 2:51 pm
Great response. I agree too that the family structure we grew up with tends to affect our desires – I always wanted a brother, so I would love to have a boy in the mix. But, like you said, I’ll be happy with either
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Janine - Alternative Housewife
1 month ago
Love the image you chose for your post! So chic.
If you aren’t happy with either gender, you probably shouldn’t have children, but then there are a LOT of people I don’t believe should be allowed to have children. At the very least those people should adopt a child of the gender they want – If a woman has enough money to go through treatments trying to get the ‘right’ gender, she could probably afford the adoption process.
I think I subconsciously wanted a girl but when I found out he was a boy I got on board really quickly and now I am so GLAD to be having a boy.
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Maria Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 2:52 pm
This is how I want to look when I’m pregnant hahaha. I agree with this, isn’t it curious how almost entitled some people act when it comes to offspring? You’re going to make such an amazing mommy!
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caitlin marie
1 month ago
I want a boy and two girls! in that order, haha, but I would NEEEVVER do anything to manipulate the way it worked out. Really I plan to let the gender be a surprise, that’s the way my parents did it for both me and my brother, so it has just always seemed like the right way for me as well – of course when the option is actually presented my tune may change, haha.
xo caitlin
pourlamourdefashion.blogspot.com
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Maria Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 2:53 pm
So true, love the honest response. Do you have names picked out?
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Renee
1 month ago
My husband and I will be happy either way–we want four children, so we’re hoping that we’ll have at least one of each gender
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Maria Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 2:55 pm
Aww, I love it when people have several children. I have my one sister and I think I always wished to have more siblings (not that I’m not happy with her
!).
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Lynzy
1 month ago
Just found your adorable lil blog! Now following, follow me?
xo Lynzy
http://fromskirtstoskillets.blogspot.com
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Maria Reply:
July 29th, 2010 at 2:55 pm
Thanks for stopping by!
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